By Suede Nikita

Chiselled into a gold tablet paid for by the Saudi Ministry of ‘Education’ (or at least they should be):

1. Use Ahad hadith (single chain narrations) to persuade people that this is what the Prophet said (most of ISIS’ ‘fatwas’ from raping Yazidis to killing people are extracted from ahad hadith)

2. Use these ahad hadith in the way you want with no regard for how classical authorities understood them

3. Mistranslate these hadiths (and everything else) at will – Allah will reward you, it’s for a good cause

4. Use modern ‘scholars’, specifically Albani to reject any hadith when it doesn’t suit you

5. Pretend things are Muttawatir (mass transmitted like the Quran) and Ijma (agreed upon) when they are not – if challenged give evidence without translating or mistranslate. If cornered, use Salafi sources (Ibn Taymiyya etc) to ‘prove’

6. Decry anyone who disagrees as a modernist, heretic or better…