Imagine that the month is March and you have a ministry. Your last newsletter was in December of the previous year, after a trip where you did some evangelizing work. Like any normal person, you’d choose the 28th of March to do another yearly newsletter. This newsletter will be an update about your events from 2016 and 2017, essentially repeating what you already wrote in December and adding on the one or two events you’ve done for 2017. Choosing March 28th was a strategic decision you see, which I’ll explain below.

So randomly, in the middle of a “yearly newsletter”, at a “random” point in the year where you just repeat what you wrote in the previous newsletter, you casually mention that tomorrow is a big day for you. You turn 28 years old and you want the world to know you’re a big boy now:

Snippet of Jonathan’s “Newsletter”

Not only does he mention this in literally the middle of the “newsletter”, he dedicates an entire paragraph to it. Two lines gets its own paragraph, and it just happens to mention that March the 29th is Jonathan’s birthday. The least he could’ve done to make it any less obvious was add it on to a longer paragraph, but Jonathan isn’t like that, he seriously wants you to know that his birthday is tomorrow, so it gets its own paragraph. You would think that he must have had another reason for doing a yearly newsletter at the end of March the day before his birthday, because we assume that Jonathan is professional and obviously is not that egoistic that he’d send out a newsletter on the day before his birthday, to tell everyone that his birthday was the next day.

Except that’s exactly what he did.

So, since you went through all that effort to tell us that your birthday is on March 29th, 1989, Jonathan McLatchie, then we’d like to wish you a happy 28th birthday. Great job on the newsletter, excellent timing!

Categories: Silly, Unbelievable, Utterly idiotic

Tags: birthday, jonathan mclatchie, newsletter